Finding The Good

If there's one thing that I have noticed lately, it would be a sort of unflattering substance that seems to be growing and growing. I include myself in this discovery. It's as if a grudge is being carried around, or, a mental hatred of something that has yet to occur - and with this hatred an inevitable outcome of what they assumed would happen does, in fact, happen. I walked into 7-11 finding that as I was looking for gum, a person walked into the store for lottery tickets, being absurdly rude, and the demeanor of this person was completely noticeable when they first walked in. Was it a bravado of readiness because they thought they would be holding up the line for minutes on end? Was it because they knew that the guy behind the counter would have a bit of trouble with them calling out the numbers as if playing a speed round of Bingo? Or was it just for the purpose of not liking or wanting to contribute in small talk, should it present itself? I may never know.

I've been noticing how my stance on common courtesy has dwindled in some areas. Being the Texas country boy that I am, it bothers me. I work in retail/sales, so a smile is always on my face when I'm on the clock, ready to make that sale, because this is how I make my paycheck. I sometimes would rather not smile, being as this is work, and being as this is not an establishment that I enjoy being part of, and this could be part of my predicament.

I have seen people get upset when they have to repeat themselves and say, "I said NO onions!", followed by the "bitch." said underneath their breath. I have seen a postal worker, who clearly disliked their position, be rude to the three people standing in line in front of me. I have seen myself be a complete dick to a car sales guy, in reasoning that he was a car sales guy. It's a circle. It's life. It's a game. It's a circle. There are genuinely nice, friendly, breezy people in this world. Some of whom have the patience that most dream of and the qualities of human-ness and a caring nature that are envied by many. Still, we go out the next day, and do the same thing. There are of course those days when you are nice to everyone, or you're indoors all day and haven't even had the priveledge to see anybody. Either way, it was a good and pleasant day. It's like smoking, or rather, quitting smoking. You see the person in an everyday activity not smoking, and you want that, and you try it. Then the thought goes away for a few minutes, and you are, without a flinch, as if it is a reflex, back to what you were doing before. Then, after you do it, you think back to the good person doing the good deed. In fact, there are those people who don't even see the good, or the nice person, or the friendly gesture, and this is what we do not want to become. I don't want to be bitter. I don't want to be a tool because it is my nature. Because it isn't. So many people I have seen lately have been walking around feeling rushed or with an attitude or overall not giving a shit. The fact that we wake up every morning is a blessing in itself, and it is hard to keep that in mind; because of its consistency with daily life. But we should keep it in mind. It should be held that anything at anytime can happen. Our worries shouldn't be that of ugliness. Our enemies shouldn't be attached to strangers on the street, or anyone else for that matter. We shouldn't have premonitions about things that haven't happened yet, nor should we make assumptions about people and places just to create a negative. We should breath, live and love and live and love and live and love. Here is a great example: I took notice of so many people lately having a negative impact, that I didn't see many of the good that could have happened at that same moment. And this should be my reflex - finding the good.